Pepper will give a speech to Community Leaders at 10:OO PM in front of the 7-11 on Minnesota Ave. In order to ensure a positive reception, no community leaders will be invited, but rather several homeless will don pants and dickies made of newspaper to convince passers by that important people are listening.
Hitler Lady spoke this evening to a group of Pepper campaigners to outline the style of speech he will be giving. Following Miss Congeniality Palin's lead, he is avoiding any facts in favor of a series of personal statements about his day to day activities (listing places he has urinated, discussing his favorite places to panhandle, etc). This will be intermingled with catch phrases he has stolen from pre-fabricated food products. A sample from a speech draft follows:
"Yesterday I pottied on the tree in front of the abandoned building at 7th and Q. There's always room for J-E-L-L-O. I like to drink water from the reflecting pool and then eat ducks. It ain't easy bein' cheesy."
We request available supporters to RSVP for this event, but you must provide your own dicky.
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